lessons learned from special ed

i don't actually think i should write this post right now because i haven't thought everything over as much as i like to do, but i want to get something out there because i've been humbled these last couple weeks.

i've been working one-on-one with a downs syndrome student in a special needs/life skills classroom. and these students are something else. i never thought i'd be in a special ed classroom, it's not really my thing. but every day is an adventure, and every day is hilarious, and every day those ten kids make my day full of sunshine.

see these kids are all different, and they all have different levels of functioning, but they all accept and love each other like i've never seen in a classroom before. it's so refreshing and encouraging! usually at some point during the day, my student or another student throws some kind of tantrum or makes a noisy scene, but the kids just go on with their work and later will comfort the party involved. today one student was feeling sick, and all the other students gathered around him. they kept repeating how sorry they were for him and just wanted him to feel better, and they rubbed his back and gave him hugs (though i'm not sure he wanted them :)). i can't describe the loving feeling that i get from them, but they hold such an innocence about them that i've allowed all of them to quickly attach themselves to my heart.

i'm reading "Searching for God Knows What" by Don Miller (which i'll probably blog about when i'm finished) and it's just excellent. this evening what i read made me cry; he was telling the story of a boy in his middle school who was bullied. and he was writing about this ridiculous cycle of how we compare ourselves to one another.

A child learns early there is a fashionable and an unfashionable in the world, an ugly and a pretty; a valued and an unvalued. Where this system comes from, God only knows, but it is rarely questioned, and though completely illogical and agreed upon by everyone as evil, it remains in play, commanding our emotions as a possession. It isn't something taught to us by our parents; it is something that comes naturally, as though a radioactive kind of tragedy happened, screwing up our souls. Adulterated or policed, the system can grow to something more civilized, but no less dominant as a drive of nature. In youth the system is obvious. If you want to learn the operating system to which humans are subjected, step into a classroom of preteen students and listen to the dialogue. You will hear the constant measurements, the talk about family wealth, whose father drives what car, who lives in what neighborhood, or who is dating whom.

not so in special ed. if only i could've had what these kids have.

Christianity and politics

one of my most recent questions that i've been trying to work out is what the role of Christianity in politics is. and i'm still not sure, but i do know that they're not as connected as people try to make them.

for example, this pastor dude who was burning the Quran this weekend...i can't believe he had the nerve to do that in the name of Christ, because it's purely political. and there's no way Christ would condone such behavior.

when you look through the Bible, there's not much about Jesus and politics. there's Jesus loving people, but he doesn't say much about government. he does tell us to "render to Caesar what is Caesar's." and we're commanded to abide by the laws of the government as long as it doesn't go against God's word. so if the government passes a law making abortions legal, that doesn't mean Christians should go out and get abortions, nor does it mean we can hate those who do, nor does it mean we can hate those who passed the law.

ISN'T THE GOSPEL ABOUT LOVE AND NOT HATE?

quite honestly i think the Christian's role in politics is to remain neutral, and a Christian's role IS to spread Christ's love.

around here most Christians label themselves as Republicans. let me ask you, conservative Christians, what good does it do argue with a democrat about what you believe politically when you could be loving him? and what good does it do to make comments about how much you hate Obama/democrats when you could be praying for him and this whole country?

not placing the blame on everyone else, i need to watch my attitude as much as the next person and be careful that what i say and do is Christ-like. oh, what it would be like to be immersed in Christ constantly...

quote journal

a couple years ago my good friend, who will doodle on anything, gave me a journal she had bought in china which she decorated for me. on the front she wrote a quote by Anton Chekhov: "Don't tell me the moon is shining; show me the glint of light on broken glass." you see, we were both english ed majors, and in one of ourexcellent classes all of our fellow english ed nerds would teach mock lessons. and they were all brilliant because we're all brilliant (i miss those people). one of our peers taught on the concept of showing and not telling in creative writing, and i think we all became better writers because of his lesson.

all this unnecessary story to say that this journal is now my quote journal. i find that the best books have the best quotes, and i try to pick out great quotes in all the books i read (unless the book isn't good) based on at least one of the following criteria:

1. it says something good or profound that i may or may not agree with

2. it's just a beautifully written line

3. it says something that applies to me

4. it says something that makes me think

so i'm gonna share some of these quotes. not all of them right now because there are so many. today i think i'll share from one of my most recently read books - blue like jazz by don miller. i recommend this book to all christians because it's well written, easy to read, anecdotal, and thoughtful; that is to say, it challenges your christian walk because it offers his thoughts on what christians are and what they should be. i'm reading his next book, searching for God knows what, and it's even more challenging to me than blue like jazz. he totally takes God out of the box that we put Him in.

so, without further ado, here are the quotes:

I didn't love God because I didn't know God.

...The problem is not out there; the problem is the needy beast of a thing that lives in my chest...it did me no good to protest America's responsibility in global poverty when I wasn't even giving money to my church...Do I want social justice for the oppressed, or do I just want to be known as a socially active person?

I don't think, however, there are many people who can stay happy for long periods of time [speaking of spiritual "highs"]. Joy is a temporal thing...I made the mistake of wanting spiritual feelings to endure and remain romantic...What was more frustrating than the loss of exhilaration was the return of my struggles with sin.

...what I believe is not what I say I believe; what I believe is what I do...Andrew very kindly explained that if I do not introduce people to Jesus, then I don't believe Jesus is an important person.

...I want my spirituality to rid me of hate, not give me reason for it. [on a pastor who made a comment that he hated Bill Clinton]

It comforts me to think that if we are created beings, the thing that created us would have to be greater than us, so much greater, in fact, that we would not be able to understand it.

...when we reduce Christian spirituality to math we defile the Holy.

...even though there are so many students having sex and tripping on drugs and whatever, there is also this foundational understanding that other people exist and they are important. [on students from Reed University who did not make fun of a student that Christians most likely would have made fun of]